-Daddy, what's a rack?

-it's a country and now shut up kid!

1 2 were cummin for u
3 4 better lock ur door
5 6 its the crucifix
7 8 dont stay up late
9 10 were gunna kill jen

jen is this b***h in my class, err i wish i could kill her.

Minnie told mickey she wanted a divorce. mickey said your freaking crazy. minnie said no i'm freaking goofy.

(if you get it comment)

"Oh really? Well how many brownies and cupcakes did you have?" "Two! Only Two Brownies!" "Why are you laughing?" "Because I had, like, eight cupcakes."

Your momas so fat
she don't skinny dip
she chunk-a-dunk...

omg the first time i heard that it was fukin hillarious

The thing I like about escalators is that they can never be out of order, they can only be temperarily stairs.
-Mitch Hedberg

You so ugly that when you was born, the doctor looked at your butt, then your face, and said "wow!!- siamese twins!!

lol thats funny i love that!!!

I split up with my boyfriend today due to religious reasons.......... he thought he was god and i didn't!!

.i wanted to buy a candle holder.
.but i bought a cake instead.

.i wanted to get my teeth whitenend.
.but i got a tan instead.