I may be fat, but you're ugly - I can lose weight!

Excuses are like butts,
Everyone has one!
[i hope so!!!]

If nice guys finish last, and cheaters never win, then does that mean you have to be bad to win?

Pain is weakness leaving the body. Pain is good.

There is 2 ways to live your life the right way or the perfect way. and the right ways is always the best way

Happiness is like peeing in your pants, everyone can see it, but only you can feel the warmth.........

My friend told me that one, so i don't know if it is illegal to type this or not.....oh well.....

When you get annoyed, it takes 42 muscles to frown and 4 muscles to stretch your arm and punch the heck out of them.

Never take life too seriously...

you'll never get out alive

They say life's a b]i]t]c]h] but is that really a bad thing if LASSIE (the female dog) saved so many lives?!!!!?/!?!?!!?? PPL must b really coNfuSed I no i AM!!!

If you are wat you eat , i must be cheap fast and easy :P