I don't know why people love heat. Way I see it is hate and heat spelled with same letters... -.-

Cars can kiss my pedestrian ass.

I just thought about how much it would suck if the "enter" key didn't work on facebook

Friend: Have you had your first kiss?
Me: Yes I have.
Friend: Your mom doesn't count.
Me: But yours does.

Life's like "Facebook".....people will like your problems and comment, but none will solve them because everyone's busy updating theirs.

If a**h0les could fly, this place would be an airport.

Your sarcasm is like a verbal orgasm in that it is uncontrollable and explosive in nature... lol!!

Lets run away together; sike I have asthma

When you cry and look your self in a mirror you will see the baboon

A true friend is one willing to slip on the banana peel for you!!