Why should I grow fat and then run around trying to lose weight?

Brown and grey are the Funniest Colours.

Let's crack tea and g-nut jokes! Spaghetti is more expensive.

The way I live my life is as simple as possible.

I love you very much but am broke.

The brain is not the only free capital; eyes and fingers are the others, plus legs.

Why should I blame the Government for the safari ants in my bedsheets? That is all Opposition seems to do, blame blame blame for petty things.

When you win, other people lose. When you lose, they win.

Give thanks to GOD for everything you have and everything you don't!

My perfect woman believes in the GOD of Israel, avoids trousers and wears natural hair from her birthplace. Supporting Arsenal FC from London is a bonus.