New York's such a wonderful city. Although I was at the library today. The guys are very rude. I said, "I'd like a card." He says, "You have to prove you're a citizen of New York." So I stabbed him."

Somebody left me a compliment on my driving the other day. They left me a little note that said "Parking Fine."

I had a dream last night... I was eating a huge marshmellow.. When I woke up, my pillow was gone.....

Laughter:
When a smile as an orgasm :]

Bob loblaws
(say together)

"I don't think this bag of donuts is deep enough to drown my sorrows.....Crap."
~ Me

Im so Happy I could braf a rainbow!

Bombing for Peace is like having Sex for Virginity!

Learning to laugh at yourself can make you a better person.

I won a National Math Contest last week. So what if it was meant for the grade 3s and I am a grade 10!