An archeologist is the best husband any woman can have; the older she gets, the more interested he is in her. -Agatha Christie

There is a place you can touch a woman that will drive her crazy;

Her heart.

Yesterday is history. Tomorrow is a mystery. Today is a gift, and thats why they call it the present. :)

Call me a bench warmer
Cuz I ain't playin'

Boredom can kill a person.

The other day I went to put money into my wallet only to find a spider had moved in, I hadnt used it in so long!

If you love your man set him free ,
if he doesn't come back you know he's with me!!!

Why did God make man first....
Cuz you have to make a rough draft before you make a master piece

Ninjas can't catch you if you're on fire!

-saw it on a hoodie I really want :)

First Person: Did you know Micheal Jackson died?
Second Person: Wha....?
First Person: Yeah, he ate a ten year old weiner.