When I die, I'd like someone to keep updating my Facebook for me just to freak people out. Things like,

"Hey, who knew they had wifi up here?"

Relationships are a lot like algebra. Have you ever looked at your X and wondered Y?

You know what you never used to see?...woman happy to be dressed like street walkers :)

My high school had a Head Start program for homosexuals, it was called Drama Club.

What if a priest ,in the middle of performing mass,suddenly stopped..raised his arms over his head..and yelled "this is ridiculous"?

If i was a chocolate i'd be a hot chocolate

Sometimes i wish i were a nicer person but then i laugh and continue my day

Why does anyone care what the NRA thinks? We didn't ask the Klan for civil rights legislation.

Why do tests on animals if we have pedophiles in prison.

I just happen to reach back there behind my boot ..... and by golly there are straps back there!