Next time ur depressed just remember U WERE THE FASTEST SPERM CELL!!! ;D

Did you know "damm it im mad" spelled backwards is "damm it im mad"? oh the things youll come up with when your bored ;)

Everyone around me is crazy.
I'm just insane.

When someone throws skittles at you and says "taste the rainbow" Run them over with your car and say "Nationwide is on your side!"

I'm a Teen- When we sulk we do it properly. I didn't call anyone. I ignored my brother. And I owned everyone on Final Fantasy, Halo, Smash Bros, and Thirteen.

Teenagers could dwell on whatever they liked, for as long as they liked. So help anyone who tried to get it out of them before they were ready to spill. I planned to do just that.

Want to see a magic trick? POOF!!!! You're single!
Want to hear a joke? Our fake ass relationship!
Want to see the rain fall? Look at every tear I've ever shedded for you.

Back in the beginning of things..
Adam: Eve do u love me?
Eve: only bcos God asked me to.
Adam: Do u wana spend ua life with me.
Eve: With me ua life is doomed.

DEAR MAKERS OF CHERRY MEDICINE,

HAVE YOU EVER TASTED A FCUKING CHERRY?

Roses are red, violets are blue. No mutual friends, who the f**k are you?
- A facebook joke