If zombies were only looking for brains, then your safety's sure. :))

When the muse turns bad....the shit hits the fan.

Don't Hate Me Because Im Beautiful

When a girl says "what?", it's not because she didn't hear you. She's giving you a chance to change what you said.. :P

Why can't rappers just say nice things? Like, "I wanna take your clothes off
and hang them up in the closet real nice.

You were so beautiful, until your 30 day trial of Photoshop ended.

Did It Hurt When You Fell From The W***e Tree? And Banged Every Guy You Fell On

; What concert costs 45 cents ?
50 Cent feat. Nickelback .

; You text him, & he doesn't text back.
He was obviously so excited that you texted him that he fainted.

; Wouldn't it be nice if your iPod could detect your mood, and make a playlist for it? (: