; You text him, & he doesn't text back.
He was obviously so excited that you texted him that he fainted.

; Wouldn't it be nice if your iPod could detect your mood, and make a playlist for it? (:

"why date a jerk who'll barely look at you, when there are dorks who'll love you."

The best way to avoid a pothole in the middle of your lane is to go straight for it!

If you die in an elevator, be sure to push the Up button.

The average woman would rather have beauty than brains, because the average man can see better than he can think.

Last night I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and I thought to myself, where the heck is the ceiling!

We never really mature, we just learn how to act in public

Im a monkey and my name is BOBO!!!

Im bobo and that means im awesome. oh and for those who dont know how to pronounce it its bow-bow (like bow and arrow not bow down)lol