It use to be I don't wanna grow up, I'm a Toys-R-Us kid...now its.... They have adult toys now! Oh, hell yeah, let me grow up!

Your life is what you make it.
Make it important.
Make it matter.
Make your life yours.
Don't let someone else control it or be it.

Attention everyone! I'm sorry but no one can say my name anymore. It has been worn out. Someone was screaming it all night. I apologize for any inconvenience.

I noticed that my friends status said, "Stood on the edge of a cliff. About to jump". So I 'poked' her.

Lost my job as a suicide hot line operator today. Apparently, "I bet you won't!" is not an effective prevention strategy.

I must confess, on rare occasion I wish "The wise man who
once said. . ." would just shut up.

EAT BLACK CAT PINUTS BUTTER WITH BREAD

Laugh a little and life would be a little easier. fart a little and you wont get stomach. love a little and you will be love back.

You'll know your special when you relize your pushing a door that says pull.

Sometimes I think you should put a condom on your head, because if you're gonna act like a d.ck, you might as well dress like one too.