Funny Quotes

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  • I once shot an elephant in my pajamas...

    How he got in my pajamas, ill never know...

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  • Someone needs to put in more funny quotes cuzz laughin at the old ones just dont cut it no more

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  • When life gives you lemons, make grape juice and sit back while the world tries to figure out how you did it.

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  • In heaven...

    girl1(drug addict): so why did you die?
    girl2: ex husband killed me. You?
    girl1(drug addict): i got hit by a plane!!

    by Kaetaj
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  • The only guy you should cry over is George Bush.

    by Lori
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  • CARPE SCROTUM:
    Grab life by the balls.

    ^.^ Made me smile lol

    by Bugg
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  • I like dead end signs. They're kind. They at least have the decency to let you know you're going nowhere.
    -Bugs Bunny

    by Bugg
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  • When life gives you lemons tell life you don't need them because you can wow people on your own

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  • Me: A boiled egg is hard to beat in the morning....
    Friend: Ah.. ew Joey...

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  • A fat P.E (physical education) teacher..............................i dont get it?.....

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